Fighting for life...from being lost in a sea of depression I've been searching for something to focus on other than my own self pity and misery. I'm not in a place where I can serve others with more than just my kind words and thoughts...I really feel like I need to focus on some self improvement and get some kinks worked out in my mind before I can move on.
I have watched the movie Julie and Julia and just can't get that idea out of my head. To blog about cooking would be wonderful, I however have 2, sometimes 3 picky eaters, and often have 2-3 days per week in which I am too lost in my own emotions to focus on cooking. sad state of affairs huh!
I keep having a nagging feeling, one of those thoughts in the back of my mind that has told me, just keep searching, you'll find what to do. So..I'm looking at the books tonight at Costco and I see this book 'life is a verb' by Patti Digh.
I read just a bit of the back of the book, and it hit me on so many levels. My heart aches on so many levels...I don't want it to, and I want to feel good again....be me again...I see on the back of this book...some helpful ideas, and as I flipped through the book I see some gentle reminders, as well as tasks to help me get there.
- Say Yes
- Be Generous
-Speak Up
- Love More
- Trust Yourself
- Slow Down
Patricia Ryan Madson says this is the last self-help book you will ever need or want to read.
I've sunk to the lowly depths of self help books...it'll be ok...there is fight in me yet. I'm going to get through this crappy part...because that's what I do.
Here I go...time to start.
One of Josh's friends recently moved here from HI and I was talking to him mother today and she said it can be very difficult there becuase you are so separated from family. I don't know how involved you already are or how much time you have available to get more involved with your church. That's a family that's available for you.
ReplyDeleteHang in there girl. Things will get better! :D
Marianne I hate to say it, but mostly this started when I left you. I didn't want to find it in me to say goodby anymore. Sucks huh. Seeking help admits failure? I guess that is why I don't. I'm trying a natural pill, 5-HTP. The more that I have learned about antidepressants the more leary I am about going and getting some.
ReplyDeleteShelby you are right! Hawaii has been a VERY hard adjustment. I am involved in our church, minimally. I'm getting better about doing more. Especially now that my house is mostly unpacked.